Friday, June 5, 2009

Louise's Funeral

Where to begin....the behind the scenes is a story of its own, but maybe this is not the place for that.

I will start with the viewing. Louise had on a colorful outfit that Brenda and David ran out to get, because she wantd a colorful funeral. Stephen made posters of pictures to display and the kids placed photos in frames around. The music in the back ground was of Louise's old funny 45's. You know, I never harmed an onion, or Mr. Custer, and some nice ones like Walking down to Washington. Kareen's Brian was up late getting that all put together.
Anyway, Louise is in the casket up front and there are plants lining both sides. There are chairs for people to sit, and some did, but most folks stood in the foyer to talk.

Those that came: Aunto Kiyoko, her son Tommy and his wife, her sons Jimmy (which we called Little Jimmy to differentiate from Big Jimmy which was my brother) her son Danny, and her daughter Kathy.
My cousin Marj, which we all call Marji Kay(Aunt Muriel and Uncle Lum)
My cousin Muriel , which we called Little Muriel to differentiate from Aunt Muriel, and her brother Brian (Aunt Nonnie and Uncle Roy)
Those are the ones from my generation. Then there's the next Generation.
Louise's husband Fred. Louise's kids : Debora was brought by some care-givers. Brenda and her husband David, their children and grandchildren. Kareen and her husband Brian, and their children. Alice was there, her husband could not make it. Stephen and his wife Judy, and their children. Mysti and her husband Adam, and their children. Velvet and her fiance' (whose name just suddenly went out of my mind) and their baby girl.
My sister Betty and her husband Pete's children : Betsy, Eileen, (Peter couldn't make it)
Margaret, (Kevin -deceased) Colleen, Cathy, Erin, Larry, (Theresa ould not cume, she was in Ann Arbor, Michigan for surgery and our thoughts and love were sent to her). Some of the spouses
were there and some of the children and grandchildren.
My brother Jim and his wife Kae.(that is where I stayed for this trip and we had a good time together)
Then there was extended families. David's folks and his sister came. Brian's folks came. Fred's brother came.
An old friend of the family came, who is also related by Colleen being their daughter-in-law.
With all those people milling in the lobby, if anyone else came I did not find it out or I do not remember it at this time.

On the day of the funeral, they had asked a minister to do the service. He was not familiar with the family or Louise, because she did not go to his church. But he did a real nice job and would say things like,"I have been told that .." or " They tell me.." He was the only one who spoke and he chose nice scriptures and said nice things. He was great.

Then theyput the cd back on with funny songs. Brenda had just thought to herself that the most fitting song would be Please MR Custer, I don't wanna go. And wouldn't you know it... that is where the cd picked up from the night before.

The Pall bearers were: my brother Jim, Brenda's husband David, their 2 boys, Kareen's husband Brian, And they had 2 more, which I can't remember either right now. Stephen said he just could not do it. He was broken up through most of the viewing and funeral.

The minister gave a prayer at the cemetary. Then everyone put a carnation on the casket and stood a liitle off as her children gathered around her as they lowered the casket in to the grave.
Then we left for lunch.

We all went for a meal together at the VFW lodge where Betsy works. Brenda and David
provided a lot of the food and the Murphy kids did a lot too. We visited and swapped stories, laughed and cried. It was a nice send off.

Her kids were trying to get a reunion together before she passed away, I told my brother that Louise didn't miss it, we just had it early. It was good to see old family members. Aunt Kiyoko cried when she saw my cousin Brian, and she said, "You have Uncle Wally's hair." Which was true. He looked like Aunt Nonnie and her brother Uncle Wally put together. It was good to see one another and renew old memories. Like they say, good to see you but sorry for the reason.

All things considered, a lot of issues were layed to rest with the funeral of Louise and now her children can move forward and we will try to think kind thoughts.

3 comments:

purplehaze said...

Hi Patricia I am very sorry for your loss. Love ya and my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Puphigirl said...

I'm glad to hear that the family was able to laugh and work through the sadness.

EmmaP said...

i think that sometimes closure is a great beginning to healing.